The Goldmine
by resoundingdeluge
Summary: An inexperienced and pent-up Jaune walks in on Pyrrha as she's exploring her body, and offers a bit of help. He then learns a valuable lesson about dating a so-called 'perfect' girl.


Jaune's heart was lighter than air. The day after the pre-festival dance at Beacon, as he walked back to his dorm from the cafeteria, his thoughts were full of nothing but Pyrrha Nikos. Something had changed that night- the electric touch of her soft, velvety skin against his as they moved in close on the dance floor, the subtle scent of her perfume that somehow still lingered even now, and the look in her eyes that he had been too blind to see before that night. All of it added up to a magical, unfamiliar feeling that coursed through Jaune's entire body.

He _wanted_ Pyrrha, in ways he couldn't explain.

Of course, he had wanted Weiss before, but this… _this_ was something more. Jaune, inexperienced as he was, had never really considered what getting close to a girl would mean. In his mind, the task began and ended at getting her attention, and after that… everything would fall perfectly into place. He saw a flawless future with Weiss, a willing snow angel to guide him onward down the path into adulthood with her feminine charms. That night, in Pyrrha, he realized that there was something more to it. His feelings didn't stop at interest. They didn't stop at dating.

All that night and morning, he had begun to feel something new. _Lust_.

The mere thought of her caused his palms to grow hot, as though he could feel the small of her back against his uncovered hand once again as they swayed to a throbbing beat. More than once, their faces had gotten close together, and the tickling sensation of her breath on his neck made parts of his dress feel a bit tighter than they had been when he so boldly approached her. Everything about their time under the spotlight had been _perfect_ , and he had finally begun to see just what a romance with such a goddess could bring.

Jaune had left the dorm and went to eat alone, while he knew that Pyrrha was deep into studying in preparation for their first real assignment. He had been afraid that if he spent one more second in their room, Pyrrha laying upon her stomach atop the bed next to him with a book beneath her nose, radiating that same heady perfume, he might go wild. He didn't trust himself not to say, or even worse, _do_ something stupid, and sabotage his chances. And so, he went to eat alone, in hopes that by the time he returned, he would have come up with a plan. Some way, some speech or action, to sweep her off her feet. Perhaps, to earn a kiss.

Perhaps _more_.

Unfortunately for him, his mind was so clouded with newfound attraction and adolescent fantasies that he couldn't think straight. Nothing had come to him, and even his food had started to remind him of her. Even something so innocent as a hot dog and bun caused him to blush furiously as he made his selection of food from what was available, and every apple and banana on display made his mind wander to places that he couldn't believe he was visiting. Eventually, he had settled on a simple salad, hoping that nothing within it would stir up thoughts of her. Even without inspiration from his food, the thoughts still came. He had left the food hall a flustered, somewhat sweaty mess from the scenarios parading through his mind alone.

Finally, while standing right outside of the dormitory door, he made up his mind. No pickup lines, no ridiculous antics… just as she had told him, and he had told Neptune, he needed to be honest.

He needed to let her know what he was feeling, and he needed to _pray_ that she felt the same. His palm, slick with sweat inside of his glove, gripped the handle, and turned it. What Jaune found waiting for him filled him with even more all-new emotions that he had never felt for Pyrrha.

There she was, still laying upon the bed, though she had transitioned to her side. Her eyes were closed as she focused entirely upon her task, her breath shallow as she thought only of the finger buried deep inside of herself. Jaune's mouth fell agape as he watched her, his breath caught in his upper chest. Pyrrha squirmed and grit her teeth, flexing the digit as she let out a small grunt of effort. He had never seen anything like it. He had _never_ expected such behavior from _her_.

Pyrrha Nikos was picking her nose.

" _Pyrrha!_ " Jaune half-wailed, before clasping a hand over his mouth. The fiery-maned warrior opened her eyes and let out a sharp gasp as she immediately removed her pointer finger from her nostril. Atop the beautiful, porcelain skin of her fingertip was a crusted collection of boogers, hardened and a sickly yellow-green in color.

" _Jaune!_ Don't you _knock!?_ "

"Not in my own dorm! What are you… why… you're…" Jaune fumbled with his words, completely aghast at the sight. He took a horrified step backward, and fought the urges to both vomit and run away.

"It's… it's not what it looks like! I promise!" Pyrrha looked equally horrified after being caught in the scandalous act, and sat up quickly, as though she had seen a ghost. She bit her lip and tried to stammer out an explanation. "You've never… Jaune, you can't tell me you haven't had a bit of… a _booger_ that just wouldn't come out!"

" _I blow my nose like a civilized human!_ " he wailed through his glove. How could his perfect, voluptuous angel do such a thing? Was everything he knew about love and lust simply a lie?

"Sometimes, blowing your nose just doesn't work! This isn't a frequent thing, Jaune! I just… no one was around, and I was having trouble breathing through my nostril!"

Jaune lowered his hand from in front of his mouth, and balked.

"So just… I don't know, don't you have saline spray? _Anything_ but that! Pyrrha, why, just… let me get you a tissue?"

The girl's cheeks matched the crimson of her hair, and she shook her head, sounding dejected. "What's the point, now?"

Jaune's eyes widened as he was struck by sudden realization. "…oh, no. Oh, no, no, _no_. You don't… you don't _eat_ it, do you?"

" _No!_ " Pyrrha yelled, looking almost ready to cry. "Jaune, how could you even suggest that I would do such a thing!?"

He folded his arms, his embarrassment and skin matching her own with a fiery blush. "Well, how am I supposed to know, at this point? Pyrrha, we can't just… we can't pretend I never saw you. I don't know what to think anymore!"

Pyrrha whimpered as she rose from the bed and made her way to the bathroom, somehow still graceful with a wad of snot on her finger. Jaune hesitated and followed, watching from the doorway as she washed off her hand.

As she finished her cleaning away the utter filth that had taken residence atop her digit, Pyrrha looked up, and met his eyes in the mirror. She appeared utterly crushed, her expression reminding Jaune of a kicked puppy.

"Jaune… I'm sorry that you had to see that. I never would have done that, had I known you were nearby. I mean what I said- it isn't even a habit, it's just… an occasional thing." Her devastated expression began to chip away at his indignation, and Jaune found his arms falling from across his chest, down to his sides. Slowly, he began to approach her.

"Pyrrha… I'm sorry, too. I, uh, I may have overreacted." He rose his hand to the back of his head, and scratched at the errant hairs. "I mean, we all do disgusting things, sometimes. I just… happened to catch you in the act. I mean, just last week, Nora caught me mas-"

" _Jaune!_ "

He blinked in surprise, taken aback. "What? I absolutely massacred my face, with a manual razor. I'm used to electric, but I lost my cord. There was blood _everywhere_ on my cheek, and in the sink. It was super gross."

Pyrrha let out a sigh of relief as she turned to face him, resting her palms on the countertop behind herself.

"That… is not where I expected that story to go."

"And finding you picking your nose is not where I expected _our_ story to go." Jaune reached out and gently took hold of her hand, earning a confused look from Pyrrha as he raised it slightly.

" _Our_ story?" she inquired.

"Yeah. I mean… I'm already over it. My lips are sealed. Just… make sure the door is locked, next time? Or better yet, find a tissue. Or some saline. Or maybe plug one nostril and blow really hard out the other? Just… no more picking."

Pyrrha giggled as she moved forward, wrapping him in a warm embrace.

"Thanks, Jaune. I'll try to keep those options in mind."

Being so close, he could smell her perfume, and he inhaled deeply to let it wash over him. The scandalous thoughts began to surface in his mind yet again, and he found words on his lips that he would never tell another girl.

"Anytime. I mean, maybe next time… it could be _my_ finger inside of you."

Pyrrha found herself at a total loss for words, unable to speak for several seconds as her blush returned. "Jaune… I had no idea you felt that way. Do you really want to…?" she trailed off with a slight grin.

"I'll be honest… no, I don't _want_ to, but if you asked me to pick your nose for you, I probably would."

Pyrrha could do nothing more than stare, before pulling away with a disappointed frown and stomping off, back into the dorm.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** If I have to deal with these ridiculous thoughts floating into my mind, so do you people.

 **-RD**


End file.
